Why Madonna Dated Only Toyboys & Why, As She Pushes 60, She's Finally Got Bored With Them
Since he first met Madonna 35 years ago, Hollywood writer J. Randy Taraborrelli has always had the inside track on her turbulent private life. Now, as the defiant Queen of Pop is about to turn 60, he has updated his best-selling biography — with the full story of her late-life penchant for toy-boys . . .
By March 2008, Madonna and Guy Ritchie’s seven-year marriage was under strain. She felt he was becoming dull and set in his ways; he thought she, at almost 50, should dress less raunchily and start acting her age.
In particular, the film director felt her continued insistence on doing gruelling and lengthy world tours meant that she couldn’t devote enough time or attention to their children her 11-year-old daughter Lourdes, from a previous relationship, and their sons Rocco, then seven, and Malawian-born David, two, whom they’d adopted as a baby.
They were living in Wiltshire where Ritchie, ten years her junior, wanted a more settled life in the country for the family.
But the tensions between them didn’t improve and in December 2008 the couple divorced, with Madonna citing irreconcilable differences.
After the break-up, Madonna came to a decision. She no longer wanted a strong and equal partner in her life; instead she wanted fun at the end of a stressful day, good sex and a few laughs — in short, a companion who’d make few demands of her. And he’d have to be young and hot.
So what if she was 50? She was fully aware that her status as a pop icon made it easy to pull gorgeous twentysomethings, that she could offer them money, travel, celebrity and a sumptuous lifestyle.
And if a young stud found that an attractive package, then she certainly wasn’t going to discourage him.
In late 2008, not long after her divorce was announced, Madonna found the ideal candidate. He was 21 — easily young enough to be her son — intelligent, extremely handsome and had an engaging personality.
She’d met Jesus Luz when he was hired as a model for a magazine photo-shoot. In career terms, he was struggling, but everything changed as soon as he was known to be her lover.
He dumped his agent — the one who’d sent him to the Madonna photo-shoot — and signed with Ford Models.
Within a year, he’d modelled for Dolce & Gabbana in Milan, shown off the winter collection of Pepe Jeans and even attracted the attention of the staid New York Times, who suddenly found Jesus worthy of an in-depth feature.
And by the end of 2009, he was asking for £30,000 a night to work as a guest DJ in nightclubs. Such is the power of Madonna’s stupendous fame.
Yet she didn’t mind at all.
Jesus was a nice kid, she figured, so why shouldn’t he cash in while he could?
Her friends, however, had misgivings. Some were convinced that she was in the midst of a severe mid-life crisis — and to an extent, they were right.
She tried to act like turning 50 was not a big deal for her,’ said a member of her family, ‘but it was. I know for sure that it was.’
Judging by Madonna’s appearance, you’d never have known that she minded.
Her body was slim and toned, the result of yoga workouts and a strict macrobiotic diet.
Her skin glowed. Thanks to Botox, not a line could be detected on her face.
But despite radiating youthfulness, she was finding it hard to accept her advancing years. Jesus was a welcome confidence-booster; he made her feel young and attractive again.
As for Madonna, she came to expect Jesus to be there for her at all times, to listen to her complaints and help solve anything that went wrong.
At any time of the day or night, she could also bask in the admiration that shone from his blue-green eyes.
Towards the end of 2010, however, she was growing restless again.
It had by then been two years since she’d split with Guy, and she was gradually recovering from the trauma.
Jesus had been a pleasant diversion, but they were running out of common ground. Once, for instance, she’d been annoyed by something a reporter had said about the age difference between them. Disgruntled, she told Jesus: ‘My God, it’s not like I’m Joan Collins!’
To which Jesus responded, ‘Um . . . who’s Joan Collins?’
Lately, too, the couple had started bickering over nothing. ‘I have this bad habit,’ Madonna confided to a friend, ‘of being judgmental and critical when I’m losing interest in a guy. That’s sort of my thing, being a real bitch.
‘I’m self-aware enough to know it. I’m just not self-aware enough to stop it.’
Then one day, the scales seemed to fall from her eyes.
Her lover, she realised, was the best and most trustworthy assistant she’d ever had.
The problem was he’d gone from boyfriend to functionary.
From that point on, she began to view him as weak, as not having a life of his own.
Not wanting to drag things out, she was quite cold when she told him the relationship was over.
Jesus took the break-up badly.
He was just as worried about how Madonna would cope without him, he told friends, as he was hurt by her decision to finish with him.How was she going to manage? And what had he done wrong, he wailed? He’d been available to her 24 hours a day.
Of course, that was exactly what he’d done wrong. Madonna has always preferred strong men like Guy Ritchie, even if she can’t live with them.
‘When it was over,’ said Anne Wilder, ‘Jesus told me he had to look in the mirror and try to remember who he’d been before she was in his life.
‘He was so used to being Madonna’s guy, he didn’t even know who he was any more.’
With Jesus officially banished, it didn’t take long before Madonna found her next toy-boy — a 23-year-old French dancer called Brahim Zaibat. He was 29 years her junior.
A devout Muslim, he’d been hired to dance at the launch of a Madonna fashion collection at Macy’s department store in New York.
By the time the tour wound to an end in December 2012, she was no longer in any mood to have sex.
Somehow, Madonna’s relationship with him limped on through most of 2013.
Their break-up, when it came, was explosive and acrimonious, although details are scarce. All that’s known is that it is best never to mention Brahim to Madonna — unless you want something thrown at you.
Barely a month after finishing with Brahim, she hooked up with Timor Steffens, a 26-year-old Dutch choreographer and dancer — eight months later, she ordered him to pack his bags and leave.
In 2016, she started seeing Aboubakar Soumahoro, a 25-year-old model. Unlike Jesus and Brahim, he remained on the margins of her life — which was exactly where she wanted him.
Last year, Madonna adopted another two more children from Malawi — four-year-old orphan twins Estere and Stella.
Six kids, no husband, single mom — I never thought that would be me,’ she said, ‘but pretty much everything that’s ever happened to me in this life is something I never imagined.’
On August 16, she turns 60. It won’t make much difference to her: she’ll continue to mount her elaborate shows, pump out new songs and face the world with defiance.
Privately, however, Madonna admits that it would be nice to have a boyfriend ‘who might be old enough to remember the TV show Friends’.
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